Hey everybody, I hope everything is good on your end. I, myself, am going insane. I'm going in for surgery tomorrow at 11:15 AM EST. And I've never been more afraid in my life.
When I was little, I hit my elbow on the side mirror of my aunt's car. Turns out I tore the covering of the Ulnar nerve in you elbow, which is over the funny bone. When I bend my arm, this nerve pops over the funny bone, creating some discomfort. So now I'm getting it taken care of. And despite how I come off, I am terrified. I'd rather swim five 500s (100 lengths of the pool) than go in for surgery tomorrow. I'm freaking out and can't calm down.
Which brings me to our topic. Fear. That which makes your hair stand on end. What keeps you awake at night. Terror. I'm afraid of a ton of stuff. Spiders. Heights. Death. Surgery. But I've accepted a lot of that stuff. Except surgery. When I think about tomorrow, I envision the surgery that was performed on Jigsaw in Saw III. Really great right? Anyway.
Fear belittles us. Makes us afraid to speak. Case: there is a person at my school, who we'll call Jane Doe for now, and it's darn near impossible to talk to her. I've had plenty of chances, but haven't been able to do it yet. But I will tomorrow, because I'm going to school for that reason.
Fear stops us from being who we truly are. We are afraid to do things that we like because we are scared of what people will think about us. Well, I'm going to walk around and play Pokemon. I dun currr. Anyway. I seem to be getting sidetracked a ton. So I think I'm going to cut myself off. I'm watching Step Brothers and just trying to relax. I'm playing the "Stuff-Your-Face-Until-Midnight" game. Then it's an all water diet until surgery. Geez oh man. I'm scared.
The Bird and the Worm- The Used
That song seems perfect for this post. I'll be tweeting the whole affair tomorrow, so follow me @samthecarrier
With Peace, Love, and a touch of Fear,
Sam
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
YOU DID IT!!! see you conquered surgery and you can do it!
ReplyDeleteI think i shall be writing a blog about fear soon. Cause i have a lot of it lately. And it is semi-related to your jane doe topic. only we'll call him john. so comment on it.
And i love how you didn't comment my recently posted blog!! i faithfully check yours!
loveyoukid.
I love you Sam!!! I'm so glad everything went well with your surgery! The fear we feel inside really just makes us stronger, and of course Grandma was watching over you!
ReplyDeleteAnd how did everything go with your Jane Doe?!!! We need to catch up!